THE DEETER DIGEST 🥣
Your weekly bowl of CPG news, served with a side of spice
Issue #30 | May 25, 2026
🥄 FIRST BITE
The appetizer before we dive in
Welcome back. The Puig-Estée Lauder merger is dead. After weeks of family meetings and what felt like an inevitable $40 billion beauty mega deal, talks ended without an agreement. We’ve been tracking this since it surfaced — exploratory talks to serious conversations to founding families at the table to... nothing. Governance killed it.
But while one mega deal collapsed, another one emerged. Blackstone and CD&R are exploring a takeover of The Magnum Ice Cream Company — the Unilever spinoff that owns Ben & Jerry’s, Talenti, Breyers, Klondike, and Yasso. Market cap just north of €8 billion. Danone is selling its 22% stake in Lifeway after two failed takeover attempts turned the partnership toxic. And Brami closed $33M from VMG Partners for protein pasta that’s become the fastest-growing pasta brand in America.
Meanwhile, Jams landed an NFLPA licensing deal because NFL teams go through 3,600 PB&Js per week. OLIPOP dropped a gorgeous packaging refresh that finally stops lecturing consumers about gut health. BuzzBallz is up 65% to $570M under Sazerac. And Messi’s hydration brand Mas+ is shuttering after two years because even the most famous athlete on earth can’t force a sports drink into a category that doesn’t want it.
The theme this week is clarity. Puig-Estée died because governance wasn’t clear. OLIPOP’s refresh works because the message is finally clear — it’s a soda, not a supplement. Jams winning at Target and now the NFLPA is clear — better PB&J, period. The brands and deals that win are the ones where the reason to believe is painfully obvious. Let’s dig in.
🍊 THE MAIN COURSE
This week’s biggest CPG moves
Puig-Estée Lauder Merger Talks End Without a Deal
Merger talks between Puig and The Estée Lauder Companies have ended without a deal, according to the Wall Street Journal.
We’ve been tracking this for over a month. Exploratory talks. Serious conversations. Founding families meeting on terms. Reuters reporting an agreement was expected in weeks. And now — nothing. The $40 billion beauty mega merger that would have rivaled L’Oréal across prestige makeup, skincare, and fragrance is off.
The likely culprit is governance. Both families wanted control. Both had decades-long legacies tied to their brands. We flagged this exact risk in Issue #24: “How they structure shared governance — board seats, voting rights, executive appointments — determines whether this deal closes or falls apart.” It fell apart.
Estée’s stock is still down 75% over five years. The strategic logic hasn’t changed — Charlotte Tilbury, Byredo, and Dr. Barbara Sturm alongside Clinique, MAC, and La Mer would have been extraordinary. But family-controlled companies are family-controlled for a reason. Both the Lauder and Puig families built multi-generational enterprises. Neither was willing to cede control to save the other.
For the beauty industry, this means the largest potential consolidation of 2026 isn’t happening. Estée Lauder remains independent, undervalued, and in need of a different strategic path. Puig remains the most compelling collection of contemporary prestige brands without the global distribution scale Estée would have provided. Both are worse off than they would have been together.
Blackstone and CD&R Explore Magnum Ice Cream Company Takeover
Blackstone, CD&R, and several other PE firms are exploring a takeover of The Magnum Ice Cream Company. Spun off from Unilever roughly six months ago, the company owns Ben & Jerry’s, Breyers, Klondike, Talenti, Cornetto, and Yasso. Current market cap is just north of €8 billion.
The Unilever ice cream spinoff is already attracting PE interest. Six months as an independent company, and Blackstone and CD&R are circling. The portfolio — Ben & Jerry’s, Talenti, Yasso — includes some of the most recognized ice cream brands on the planet. PE firms see what they always see: a collection of strong brands that were underinvested and underoptimized inside a conglomerate, now available as a standalone with room to improve margins and accelerate growth.
Yasso being in this portfolio is worth noting — Stride backed Yasso before the Unilever acquisition. Now it could end up inside a Blackstone or CD&R platform. The ice cream category at scale is a margin story — streamlining manufacturing, optimizing the supply chain, and rationalizing the portfolio. PE is very good at that.
Danone Selling 22% Lifeway Stake — The Toxic Partnership Ends
French dairy giant Danone is selling its 22% stake in Lifeway Foods for $19.50 per share. Danone first invested in Lifeway in 1999. What started as a productive partnership turned contentious, culminating in two failed takeover attempts.
Twenty-seven years. From strategic investment to failed hostile takeover attempts to exit. Danone’s departure is the best thing that could happen to Lifeway right now. The company just posted its best quarter ever — $63M in Q1, up 37%, margins expanding, net income up 32%. The last thing a company on that trajectory needs is a 22% shareholder that tried to acquire it twice and failed. Danone's sale removes the overhang, eliminates the governance distraction, and lets Lifeway’s management team focus entirely on the gut health tailwind that’s producing the best results in company history.
Brami Closes $33M From VMG Partners — Fastest-Growing Pasta Brand
San Diego-based protein pasta brand Brami closed $33M led by VMG Partners. Wayne Wu joins the board. Founded in 2016 by Aaron Gatti, Brami originally launched as a high-protein snack brand before pivoting to pasta in 2021. Since the pivot, Brami has become the fastest-growing pasta brand in the U.S. with distribution at Walmart, Costco, Kroger, and Target.
VMG leading at $33M is a significant commitment. VMG’s portfolio includes Bare Snacks (sold to PepsiCo), Sun Bum (sold to SC Johnson), and Perfect Snacks — they know how to scale food brands through retail and exit to strategics. The pivot story is underappreciated: Brami started in snacking, recognized that protein pasta was a bigger opportunity, and completely repositioned. Five years later, they’re the fastest-growing pasta brand at every major retailer. That’s not a pivot — that’s a rebuild. And it worked. Protein pasta is following the same trajectory as protein ice cream, protein chips, and protein everything else: consumers want their staple foods to work harder nutritionally without sacrificing the eating experience.
Jams Lands NFLPA Licensing Deal — 3,600 PB&Js Per Week
Jams is now the official PB&J of the NFL Players Association. According to a 2024 New York Times report, NFL franchises go through 3,600 to 4,300 PB&Js per week. Jams and the NFLPA will co-develop the “Perfect PB&J” for retail later this year. Investors include JJ Watt and Caleb Williams.
The brand that beat Uncrustables at Target in six months just became the official PB&J of the NFL. This is the kind of licensing deal that creates a flywheel: NFL credibility drives consumer trial, retail velocity proves the product, and the NFLPA co-branded “Perfect PB&J” becomes a new SKU with built-in distribution demand. JJ Watt and Caleb Williams on the cap table means the athlete endorsement is authentic — these are actual investors, not paid spokespeople. 3,600 PB&Js per week per franchise. Thirty-two franchises. That’s over 115,000 PB&Js per week across the NFL. Jams just became the brand feeding that demand.
OLIPOP Drops Packaging Refresh — Stops Lecturing, Starts Selling Soda
OLIPOP unveiled a packaging refresh that prioritizes flavor, fun, and nostalgia over gut health and functionality.
This is the most strategically important packaging refresh of the year. OLIPOP is learning the oldest rule in CPG: eventually, the “better-for-you” product has to look like something people actually want. The original packaging led with gut-health messaging — fiber content, prebiotics, and digestive benefits. The new packaging leads with flavor. The functional benefits are still there. They’re just not the first thing you see.
This matters because OLIPOP is raising $200M from Morgan Stanley after walking away from Coca-Cola. They’re building for mainstream scale, not wellness aisle niche. And mainstream consumers don’t buy soda because of prebiotic fiber. They buy soda because it looks good and tastes good. Gut health is a reason to feel good about the purchase, not the reason to make it. OLIPOP finally understood the assignment.
Mas+ by Messi Shutters — Celebrity Doesn’t Guarantee a Category
Mas+ by Messi, the RTD hydration brand co-created by Mark Anthony Brands and Lionel Messi, is shuttering after nearly two years.
The most famous athlete on earth couldn’t force a sports drink into a category that didn’t want it. Messi has billions of fans globally. Mark Anthony Brands has a massive distribution infrastructure (including the White Claw and Finnish Long Drink acquisitions). And it still didn’t work. The sports hydration category is brutally competitive — Gatorade, Liquid I.V., PRIME, Electrolit, DryWater — and the consumer didn’t see a reason to switch to Mas+ beyond Messi’s face on the can.
The celebrity CPG graveyard keeps growing: MOSS (restructuring), PRIME ($1.3B to $300M), Allbirds ($4.1B to $39M, pivoting to AI), and now Mas+ (shuttered). The common thread is always the same: celebrity gets you a trial, but only the product gets you back. Messi is arguably the most recognized human on the planet. It didn’t matter.
💰 THE FUNDING FRENZY
Big checks being written
Brami — $33M Led by VMG Partners
Protein pasta. Fastest-growing pasta brand in the U.S.: Walmart, Costco, Kroger, Target. Pivoted from snacking to pasta in 2021. VMG’s Wayne Wu joins the board. VMG previously exited Bare Snacks to PepsiCo and Sun Bum to SC Johnson. Covered in detail above.
Proper Wild — $11M at $161M Valuation
A better-for-you energy shots and gummies brand secured $11M in funding from existing investors, including Altria, Vice Ventures, and family offices. Founded by Vincent Bradley as an alternative to 5-Hour Energy. The company has been focused on its fast-growing line of energy gummies.
$161M valuation for an energy brand that started in shots and is now scaling gummies. The format evolution mirrors what’s happening across supplements — shots were the original functional format, but gummies are the growth format. Proper Wild recognizing this and leaning into gummies is the same insight that made Grüns worth $1.2B. Altria's presence on the cap table brings tobacco-industry distribution expertise and a deep understanding of convenience-store retail, where energy shots and gummies live.
Good Molecules — Investment from Aria Growth Partners
Masstige skincare brand scored investment from Aria Growth Partners. Founded in 2019. Reportedly profitable and doing north of $100M in annual sales. Aria’s portfolio includes Hero (exited), LesserEvil Snacks (exited), Ultra Violette, Joyride, and The Inkey List.
Profitable and north of $100M. In masstige skincare. With Aria backing. Aria’s track record includes Hero Cosmetics (exited) and LesserEvil (exited) — they know how to scale accessible beauty and food brands to exits. Good Molecules’ positioning — efficacious products at accessible prices — is the sweet spot where the mass-to-prestige consumer lives. $100M+ and profitable means this brand has already proven the model. Aria’s capital accelerates what’s already working.
Stone & Skillet — $5M Series A from BFG Partners
Boston-based artisan English muffin brand closed $5M led by BFG Partners with Beliade Consumer Partners and Supernatural Ventures. Founded in 2014 by Cam Meekins and his brothers. Available at 3,000+ doors.
Yes, even English muffins can get a premium glow-up. BFG Partners, the firm that’s backed dozens of emerging food brands, sees the same premiumization opportunity in English muffins that other investors saw in tortillas (Siete), bread (Dave’s Killer Bread), and bagels (Zucker’s). Stone & Skillet, at 3,000 doors after 12 years of building, is another quiet compounder story. The brothers have been making artisan English muffins since 2014 — long before “premium bakery” was a venture-funded category.
Banagua — $5.5M from Hingham Growth Partners
Organic banana water brand secured $5.5M from Hingham Growth Partners, plus angels including Ben Kaplan, Elliot Tebele, Caleb Pressley, James Hunt, and Dr. Anthony Gustin. Currently in 3,500+ doors.
Banana water. Investable. At $5.5M and 3,500 doors. The functional water category keeps fragmenting into specific fruit-based positioning — coconut water was first, watermelon water followed, and now banana water. The angel roster is interesting — Kaplan (previously involved with Finnish Long Drink), Pressley (Barstool), and Dr. Gustin (Perfect Keto founder) bring media reach, audience, and credibility in functional nutrition.
B-SIDES — $500K Seed from Cap Ventures 8182
Upcycled snack startup closed $500K. Founded in 2025 by Yousuf Ahmed. Turns upcycled oat flour and corn grits into protein snack puffs. Launching in 1,500 stores across the northeast. Allergen-free.
Upcycled ingredients plus protein plus allergen-free in a puff format. Hitting 1,500 stores in the northeast on a $500K raise is a capital-efficient distribution building. The upcycled food movement continues to produce brands that turn food waste into functional snacks.
Sleep or Die — $1M from True Beauty Ventures
Sleep tape brand secured $1M from True Beauty Ventures. Founded by Lauren Sudeyko (ex-PepsiCo, ex-Google). Launched in 2025 with a sleep tape, expanded into sleep aids. The hero product, Sleep Strips, is formulated with L-Theanine, GABA, 5-HTP, and melatonin.
True Beauty Ventures, backing a sleep brand, extends its portfolio beyond traditional beauty into wellness routines. Sleep is one of the white spaces we’ve flagged as a likely acquisition category for Unilever’s $14.5B war chest. Sudeyko’s background at PepsiCo and Google brings operational and marketing discipline from two of the most sophisticated consumer companies on earth.
Imaraïs Beauty — Acquired by Healthy Extracts
Beauty-focused gummy supplement brand co-founded by Aaron Hefter and influencer Sommer Ray. Acquired by Healthy Extracts for an undisclosed sum. Available at Target, Ulta, and Sprouts.
A creator-led beauty supplement brand is finding an exit through a health and wellness platform company. Imaraïs at Target, Ulta, and Sprouts had proven multi-channel distribution. Healthy Extracts acquisition gives the brand operational scale and portfolio positioning alongside other wellness assets.
Strongwater — Acquired by Perfect Purée of Napa Valley
Colorado-based cocktail syrups and bitters brand acquired by The Perfect Purée. Perfect Purée has produced premium fruit products for beverage and culinary professionals for nearly 40 years. Will use its foodservice and hospitality network to accelerate Strongwater’s growth.
The foodservice distribution play. Strongwater makes great cocktail syrups. Perfect Purée has relationships with every bar, restaurant, and hotel in the hospitality industry. Combining craft cocktail syrups with institutional foodservice distribution is the kind of acquisition that doesn’t make headlines but generates immediate revenue synergies.
🆕 PRODUCT LAUNCHES & INNOVATION
This week’s innovation circus
David Protein Cod 2.0 — Now in Golden Tins
David launched version 2.0 of its wild-caught Atlantic cod. No longer frozen fillets — now packaged in sleek golden tins. 18g protein, zero carbs, 70 calories. 4-pack at $39.99. Peter Rahal putting cod in a premium tin is peak David energy — taking a commodity protein and making it a lifestyle product. Whether consumers pay $40 for four tins of canned cod is the ultimate test of brand premium.
Bob’s Red Mill Packaging Refresh
Bob’s Red Mill worked with Turner Duckworth on a bold new look. Supersized logo leveraging nearly 50 years of brand equity. The packaging is more shelf-friendly, bolder, and easier to shop. When a heritage brand with this much equity finally modernizes its packaging with a world-class design firm, the category notices. Turner Duckworth’s portfolio includes Amazon, Coca-Cola, and Samsung — Bob’s is getting the same design treatment as the world’s biggest brands.
Gordon Ramsay Launches Krude Olive Oil
Gordon Ramsay teamed with Ben and Elle Caring to launch Krude — premium EVOO with infused oils, finishing oil, and cooking spray. Cold-extracted to preserve polyphenols, packaged in metal tins to block UV. Currently, UK only. A celebrity CPG fit that actually makes sense — Ramsay’s credibility in professional cooking translates directly into olive oil. Unlike celebrity tequila or energy drinks, there’s a direct line between the person and the product category.
MUSH x Bethenny Frankel — Mocha Latte at Target
MUSH collaborated with Bethenny Frankel on Mocha Latte Protein Overnight Oats — 15g protein, 7g fiber. Nationwide at Target. Celebrity collaborations that add a single SKU to an existing retailer relationship (versus launching an entirely new brand) are lower-risk and have a higher probability of success.
Kettle & Fire Gets RXBAR’s Former COO as CEO
Sam McBride, former RXBAR COO, is now CEO of Kettle & Fire. The bone broth brand does $100M+ in annual sales. McBride served on the board for 8 years and acquired a stake via a $43M secondary in early 2025. When you put RXBAR’s former operator in charge of a $100M bone broth brand, you’re preparing for the next phase of scale — likely an exit.
More Launches Worth Watching
Arrae launched Bloat Gummies — organic ginger, lemon balm, dandelion, and postbiotics. The viral bloat product goes gummy.
Hiya expanded with Daily Growth + Protein for kids — grass-fed whey isolate and targeted amino acids. USANA bought Hiya for $205M in 2024. The expansion justifies the acquisition thesis.
Angostura expanded into cocktail syrups — Spicy Honey and Demerara Sugar. The #1 bitters brand entering adjacent bar cart categories.
Winky Protein Pudding from Novus Foods (Fresh Cravings, Noosa, La Mexicana) — 10g protein, 80-90 calories, no added sugar. Three flavors.
PerfectTed launched protein matcha with 18g protein at Tesco and WH Smith in the UK.
OSULLOC launched Matcha Plus functional line — Glow, Gut Ease, Awareness. Korean premium tea goes functional.
Grüns dropped limited-edition Popsicle Firecracker flavor in adult and kids versions.
Pon Pon — protein biscuits inspired by Pocky. 10g protein, 5g fiber. Strawberry Milk and Matcha Latte.
FELR — men’s recovery supplement with melatonin-free Sleep Support. Magnesium, apigenin, zinc, boron, L-Theanine.
Sierra Nevada launching Shred Beer Soda in June — brewery gift shops first, then California and North Carolina.
Pabst discontinuing Schlitz after 177 years. One final batch using the 1948 recipe.
Biom launched Cleansing Body Wipes at Target.
Costa Brazil opened its flagship at Hudson Yards.
DUA by Augustinus Bader pop-up at Selfridges, London.
📊 THE DATA DIGEST
Numbers that matter
BuzzBallz: Up 65% to $570M
RTD cocktail brand BuzzBallz grew more than 65% in off-premise channels during the 52-week period ending April 19th. Just under $570M in dollar sales. Owned by Sazerac since 2024. When Sazerac acquires a brand and plugs it into the distribution machine, this is what happens. 65% growth post-acquisition validates the entire Sazerac infrastructure thesis we’ve been tracking with 818 and SIPMARGS.
OLIPOP Retail Volume Up 17.5%
OLIPOP retail volume increased 17.5% for the four-week period ending May 2nd, following a 22.3% bump in March. Progressively reducing retail prices as well. Walking away from Coca-Cola, raising $200M, refreshing the packaging, and still growing volume 17.5% while dropping prices. OLIPOP is playing the long game.
Electrolit: Up 22.8%
KDP-affiliated hydration brand Electrolit posted 22.8% retail sales growth for the four-week period ending May 2nd. Gatorade grew 4.3% in the same period. Electrolit, growing five times faster than Gatorade, tells you the hydration category is being reshaped by brands that offer superior formulations and cultural relevance.
IM8 Raises Guidance to $190-210M
IM8, the longevity brand from Beckham and Prenetics, raised full-year revenue guidance to $190-210M after growing 23% in Q1. Expected to grow 33% in Q2. New SKUs coming: hydration, creatine, and kids’ gummies. The brand that hit $100M in 11 months is now guiding to $200M+ in year two. The velocity keeps validating.
🏪 DISTRIBUTION DOMINATION
Everyone’s everywhere
Target
MOSH launched at 2,000 stores — Maria Shriver and Patrick Schwarzenegger’s brain health brand arriving after the $13M Series A. Wildwonder expanded to 1,700 stores. Smash Kitchen debuted. Biom Body Wipes. Target’s emerging brand pipeline delivered four new brands this week across protein bars, kombucha, condiments, and personal care.
Walmart
Neuro expanded to 3,000+ stores — one of the largest single-brand Walmart expansions we’ve tracked. Three thousand doors for a functional beverage brand signal Walmart sees sustained velocity worth betting on at scale.
Kroger
Juni launched at 750+ stores. Kroger continues to give emerging functional brands significant door counts during initial rollouts.
H-E-B
Small Beer launched. The UK-based lower-alcohol beer brand enters Texas through the most important regional grocer for beverage innovation.
Sprouts
Equip Foods made its retail debut. The protein brand is entering the natural channel through Sprouts, the incubator retailer that validates brands for larger chains.
Whole Foods
Cymbiotika launched at select stores. The premium supplement brand is entering the most curated natural grocery retailer.
Specialty and Regional
Sourmilk launched at Citarella in NYC. Mochidoki at Big Y. Drippy on Misfits Market. Jams are now available nationwide via Gopuff — the brand that beat Uncrustables and landed the NFLPA, adding on-demand delivery.
👋 PEOPLE MOVES
Sam McBride, former RXBAR COO, took over as CEO of Kettle & Fire. Eight years on the board. Acquired a stake via $43M secondary. When your new CEO has been studying the business from the board for eight years and has put his own money in, the alignment is total.
Andrew Archambault officially took the President and COO chair at Nutrabolt (Bloom, C4 Energy) after leaving the Hershey Company presidency.
🔥 THE HOT TAKE
My unfiltered opinion on this week’s madness
The Puig-Estée Lauder merger is dead. And I think it’s the biggest missed opportunity in beauty this decade.
Estée Lauder’s stock is down 75%. The brand portfolio — Clinique, MAC, La Mer, Tom Ford Beauty — is extraordinary but underperforming. Puig’s portfolio — Charlotte Tilbury, Byredo, Dr. Barbara Sturm — is the best collection of contemporary prestige beauty brands. Together, they would have rivaled L’Oréal. Apart, both are weaker.
The killer was governance. Two families. Two legacies. Neither is willing to cede control. We flagged this exact risk a month ago. Family-controlled companies are family-controlled for a reason. And that reason sometimes prevents the deals that would create the most value.
But the bigger story this week isn’t the deal that died. It’s the clarity emerging across every other story.
OLIPOP refreshed its packaging and stopped leading with gut health homework. The new cans lead with flavor and fun. That’s clarity. The product hasn’t changed. The message has. And the message is finally right: this is soda that happens to be better for you, not a supplement that happens to taste like soda.
Jams landed the NFLPA. The brand that beat Uncrustables at Target is now the official PB&J of the NFL. JJ Watt and Caleb Williams are investors. The “Perfect PB&J” is coming to retail. That’s clarity. Better ingredients, better product, better positioning — and now institutional sports credibility to prove it.
Brami pivoted from snacking to pasta and became the fastest-growing pasta brand in America. VMG wrote a $33M check. That’s clarity. Find the bigger opportunity. Commit to it completely. Let the velocity prove you right.
And Mas+ by Messi is shutting down. The most famous athlete on earth couldn’t make a sports drink work. That’s clarity too — the brutal kind. Celebrity is not a category strategy. It’s an awareness tool. And awareness without product-market fit produces nothing.
The brands winning right now are the ones where the reason to believe is painfully obvious. OLIPOP: It’s a delicious soda. Jams: it’s better PB&J. Brami: it’s protein pasta. Simple. Clear. No explanation needed.
The brands losing are the ones where the reason to believe requires a paragraph of context. Mas+: it’s hydration from Messi and... why exactly? Keys Soulcare: it’s beauty from Alicia Keys that... E.l.f. couldn’t figure out either.
Clarity wins. Every time.
🎙️ COMING TUESDAY
Unpackaged Goods Episode
Breaking down why the Puig-Estée Lauder merger collapsed and what it means for the beauty industry. OLIPOP’s packaging refresh and why it’s the most strategically important rebrand of the year. Jams is landing the NFLPA after beating Uncrustables. Brami’s $33M from VMG for protein pasta. Why Mas+ by Messi shuttering proves celebrity is not a category strategy. BuzzBallz at $570M validating the Sazerac infrastructure thesis. And Blackstone is circling the Unilever ice cream spinoff.
🥫 ONE MORE THING...
Before you close this tab
Lionel Messi is arguably the most famous athlete who has ever lived. Billions of fans. Global recognition that transcends sports, language, and geography. Mark Anthony Brands — the company behind White Claw — provided distribution infrastructure. And Mas+ still couldn’t make it work.
In the same week, Jams — a PB&J brand that launched six months ago with zero celebrity co-founders — became the official PB&J of the NFL Players Association after outselling Uncrustables at Target.
One brand had the most recognizable human on earth. The other brand had a better product.
The product won. It always does.
Until next Sunday, Jonathan Deeter Your CPG-Obsessed Friend
P.S. — Pabst is discontinuing Schlitz after 177 years. One final batch using the 1948 recipe. A hundred and seventy-seven years. Schlitz survived Prohibition, two World Wars, the craft beer revolution, and the hard seltzer craze. But it couldn’t survive 2026. Meanwhile, Jams has been alive for six months and just landed the NFL. The shelf doesn’t care about your history. It cares about your velocity.
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